Before A Fall

Ken and I only wear our wedding rings when we go out.  Usually it is he who forgets to wear his ring and I remember to put it on.

Of course, we joke that when we wear our rings, we remember to be married.

The last few times we've gone out together, I've been the one to forget while he has his on.  My standard joke is that it looks like he's cheating with me.

Today we were headed out for a day of shopping.

Me: Oh, look.  I forgot to be married today.

Ken:  Not me.  (holds up his beringed hand)  You look like a home wrecking whore.

Me:  That sounds horrible.  Why would you say that?

Ken:  'Cuz you say it when you forget to wear yours.

Me:  You're right.


These are typical conversations that don't even phase me anymore.  On the other hand, I got myself a few pretties today.  A bracelet, dangly earrings, and sunglasses.

I also picked up a pair of nude pumps (once again, late to the dance).  They have five inch spike heels and an inch high platform.  I love them and they don't pinch.  Of course, my poor feet are in agony after wearing them for ten minutes but that is long enough to get from my car to a seat in church.

I decided to walk around in them since my usual shoes tend to be much more sensible than these.  A little practice is always good when one is no longer used to wearing stripper high heels.  I walked around in my dining room and then headed upstairs with no incident.  I put together an outfit for church tomorrow and tried it on with barely a wobble.

You know what's going to happen, right?

I decided to ask Ken what he thought of the outfit.  I stepped out into our upstairs hall and felt something inside one of the shoes.  So I lifted my foot and leaned over to pull off my shoe and remove the offending irritant.

WHAM!

I landed on my backside.  Surprisingly, I only said ow because I bumped my elbow on the hardwood floor.  Apparently I can not balance like a stork in stripper heels.

Ken's response:  He yelled up the stairs, "If you hurt yourself, I am never letting you buy heels again."

Then he decided to play Nice Husband and asked if I was hurt or if I needed help up.

I can now walk properly in them.  Luckily the only thing hurt was my pride and vanity.