Our dishes are piled up in our sink. My husband said he was going to do them on Thursday. It is now Sunday. It drives me crazy seeing all those dirty dishes. But because he said he would do them, I leave them sit. I could easily do them myself in about twenty minutes and they would no longer cause me grief. So I wait patently for Ken to step up to the sink.
Why have I told you this? It's embarrassing for me to admit that my house isn't spotless.
I just wanted a segway into how chores are divided in our home. Despite years of women's liberation and a struggle to be on equal footing with men, I do the majority of the housework. Ideally, he would come home from work and sweep or throw a load of laundry in the washer. That scenario doesn't work for us.
I only work three hours a day, two in the morning and one at night. Ken works night shift and has trouble sleeping during the day. Life is easier for both of us if I take on the majority of tasks. He feels better more relaxed in the evening when the house is clean. I don't get upset anymore because he isn't doing what chores he agreed to take on. Taking away his household workload allows us to relax and enjoy the afternoon and evening together.
He does have a few things I expect him to do. He scrubs the shower and takes out the trash. He cleans out the fridge every month. The things I don't want to do. We alternate changing the cat litter.
As a bonus, because he doesn't feel like he is required to do housework, he is more likely to do the dishes or clean the living room. Because he wants to help me out.
It sounds like he has all the advantages in this setup. He works an eight hour day. I work three. If you add housework to that, I only work about four hours. I feel accomplished at the end of the day, which puts me in a much better mood.
In the end, this is really just so we can spend time together doing what we want to do, not doing housework.
(photo credit)
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